steps to becoming Japanese. 1. be born to Japanese parents. or 2. be born and raised in Japan. (no Miranda that doesnt mean moving there at 21 when you are a fully grown adult) 3. abandon your own citizenship and get a Japanese one and you´ll legally be ´´Japanese´´. besides I thought she wasn´t Japanese anymore and would only identify as a muslim from now?. I wonder whats going on in her brain during the day ´´am I japanese or muslim now!?´´ IDENTITY CRISIS INTENSIFIES
I know how fucking useless this rant will be cause I think we all know this, but I just hate how unfair life is. I keep seeing it in so many aspects of my life, that it can make me super depressed. I´ve been a cellist for close to 20 years by now, and when I still was in a youth orchestra there was Always this snotty ass bitch who honestly wasnt that good and looked down on many of the kids there because we came from a group the goverment funded, so kids from lower income backgrounds could learn to play instruments, so of course we didnt have a fucking 2500 dollar bow or a 10,000 plus cello. and there were SO many people there better than snotty bitch, One of my ex friends was SO GOOD, her intonation was flawless, yet she was so humble, and Always so kind and willing to help us less fortunate players like me lol out, yet she will never go to the same level/places by her talent alone as snotty bitch. All because of snotty bitch family connections and her last name. I know I sound like a bitter old hag, but her skills were/are SO MEDIOCRE ITS LAUGHABLE. all because of fucking social connections. heck even I am better and I fucking suck and I could NEVER get into some fancy music school by my skills alone trust me on that, so that that bitch is out there being her usual bitch self thinking she is queen of the cello world. ugh honestly. fuck you and your stupid family name and shove youre fancy cello bow up your ass.
and another rant, my BF who is a muslim is becoming more and more liberal religious wise and starting to drift further apart from his religion, he doesnt partcipate in the whole ramadan thing either and eats with me but tells me ´´not to tell his brother/sister´´ because they already complained to him about his lack of faith in the recent years, even though his family is very liberal so it honestly came as a surprise to me. but now I low key suspect his family is blaming me cause he´s dating a non muslim woman. cause recently they started asking me about ´´well dont you think its weird in islam we do this and that´´ and all these religious questions I have never been bombarded with before. like they were trying to figure out my opinions on those things, What do they even think I do really? as if all I try to do is get him away from his religion like we have nothing better to do. lol sorry, but if I really cared that much about my bfs religious background(and in this case, lack of) I would have never even considered dating someone semi religious in the first place. it wouldve been bye bye the minute I´d find out
tbh I think you could be right as well. she might have assumed she has bpd purely by googling and may not want to admit she is self diagnosing , and either now tries to mimic and over exaggerate the symptoms subconsciously or consciously after reading them. Then again. BPD people are often known to thrive of negative attention or be a little theatrical, So it can go either way. I do think she tries way too hard to fit into the stereotypical bpd image. Especially since it's all out of nowhere.
that cover is so.....utterly unappealing I have no words for it. an interesting book cover is one of the most Important things in peaking someones interest in wanting to pick up your book believe it or not. This looks like the edgy wannabe artsy 12 year olds first attempt at using photoshop. And that title....I'm not a native English speaker so dont know it comes across towards them but it makes me go I'm not even going to touch the summary, no words. If this sells then its proof all of us on pull can become succesful novelists.
I learned Japanese mostly on my own(by that I mean, no classes, no irl japanese interaction and no japan trips) I´m a intermediate level. I listened to a lot of Jpop and Jrock, watched J horror, drama´s, movies. anything to get immersed with the language. Subtitles are the key in the beginner stages. I also used lang 8, no idea if its still around but I´m sure if it is not, theres an equivalent around of it. you write an entry(like a diary) in the language you are learning and native speakers correct you. it helped me TREMENDOUSLY. I recommend this to anyone learning any language on their own. I´d say its a lot more effective than just remembering grammar rules. A combination of the two is the best. for learning Japanese vocabulary, I´d recommend studying all the JLPT vocabulary(you can download the pdf files for free online) even if you do not plan on ever taking the JLPT. If you learn all words from jlpt 5 to 1, you´ll be at an upper advanced level and able to understand almost anything as it is filled with the most common words. a few years ago I felt myself really lacking in vocabulary. so I scrabbled through the jlpt 5 to 3 vocab. I learned about 300 new words and it made a major difference since a lot of common daily words are on the JLPT list. I can say find Japanese friends online, but it honestly never worked for me(though it may work for you idc). I usually ended up helping them with their english or we´d exchange 1 to 3 japanese messages back and forth and then call it quits. when you finally reached the lower intermediate level, try doing the things you love in Japanese. you like cooking? look for recipes in Japanese. Are you into crafting? again, find it in Japanese! if you are into vlogging, watch Japanese vloggers, Sekine Risa, Mikipon, Kumamiki. Pretty much any of your interests, try doing it in Japanese.
Viola jokes are becoming so fucking old and stale just stfu violinists and fellow cellists lol. I never got the viola hate either. the sound of it is barely different from the violin a instrument universally loved. You do not need to point out to someone that they have a zit, are balding, have hair loss, bad skin, are too fat/too skinny etc. People are aware themself and Its a shitty thing to do and point out to them and makes you look like an ass. Final Fantasy X2 was a good game and I think a lot of people(especially guys) hated it mostly because the story line was revolving around females and the storylines being more´´girly´´ opposed to the previous games. Not an anime watcher myself, but I´m surprised how Kimi ga nozomu eien is so underwatched and underrated, it is one of the very few animes I could enjoy because of the mature story lines and absence of high pitched voiced overly hyper annoying anime girls. and amazing soundtrack. Classical musicians thinking they are better than the rest of the orechestra cause they believe their instrument is the ´´hardest´´ are the worst. As a pianist, I have to say 99% of Rock and metal songs sound terrible and cringy when played on the piano. listining to Breaking Benjamin covers on the piano was pure torture. As a classical musician, I find video game/tv/movie/anime soundtracks better composed and more enjoyable/interesthing to play/listen to than most classical arrangements/pieces. People who think you cant be depressed about your own issues cause there are starving children in africa. its not a competition you know? Being able to speak a ´´difficult´´ language like Japanese,Arabic,Finnish etc does not make you superior or amazingly intelligent.
Im sorry but you can not compare personality disorders to the normal ups and downs of the average person. That's called life and it's a normal part of life and always has been. Everyone in their life time will face struggles mentally at some point. Whether that'll be Financially, loss of friends,parents,job, moving, and everything in between. No doubt some have it worse than others. And of course adults can also develop mental health issues like depression and PTSD. But on average people struggle and will not develop mental health disorders. facing some struggles is a normal and average part of life. No one goes through life with a smile on their face 24/7,. But its just incomparable to having a severe mental disorder that develops due to early childhood trauma. These people often struggle their entire life surrounded by people who they will rarely be able to relate to or are stigmatized which is certainly true for bpd. That is not a "quirk" or "attribute". And uncontrolled bpd is a VERY severe mental disorder. Ive been in the rollercoaster of dealing with someone like venus, it has been hell. These kind of disorders like bpd,did etc can not develop in adulthood, because when you struggle in adulthood the impact is very different compared to when it happens in your childhood. Cause as an adult you are already emotionally developed with a steady and strong personality, but abuse during childhood(<10) when children are super vulnerable and still developing rapidly will have a major impact on who you are going to become as an adult. It is very different progress even compared to severe abuse happening in adult hood.
kind of inappropriate and offensive to call people with mental health issues "crazies" a lot of these people have gone through enough and often are a victim of abuse(as is venus) no need to devalue them more. I'm also not saying venus should sneak into a mental ward and grab whatever is available. But since I also have a bpd family member. I know how hard it can be to deal with someone like that. Since they often go through period of idolizing someone and then hating you because you looked at them the wrong way it can be very draining. My bpd sister benefitted a lot from reaching out to the local bpd community. The average person just doesnt understand this disorder if they come from 0 experience and dont want to deal with something like that. It's a very complex disorder and since venus's is still very active it will be close to impossible to form healthy friendships that way. It's kind of like AA, where people with addiction can find a place to talk to like minded people, I could never understand what it's like to be an alcoholic.
I think once you enter your 20s making friends is tough if you do not have a solid foundation of hobby´s or a job plus an extraverted personality. I also think but this is just my opinion, if her mental health is really that severe. friendship with average people is close to impossible and she´d be better of looking for friendships in communities with people who struggle with mental health issues. I know its its rough to say, but lots of ´´regular/normal´´ adults, do not want to develop new friendships with mentally ill adults most of the time. especially not a disorder that will Always be kind of lurking around the corner. .Unfortunatly since mental health issues is ever so stigmatized in Japan. I think it is going to be very hard for her to find like minded mentally ill people in Japan. I also do not know how good her Japanese is but just making assumptions saying its not close to being anything close to native level expression/speaking wise. which would also make it more difficult going with people on a deeper level. I´m also afraid for her the day will eventually come where she´ll have to leave Japan and either return to Switzerland or Hungary. it is pretty sad how this girl has pretty much nowhere, no place to really call ´´home´´. but I think Japan will not be the answer for her in the long run.
Alcohol might be socially acceptable in many societies but that doesnt make it "good", Alcohol IS in fact a hard drug, but since it is also the most socially acceptable kind of drug, people do not make a big deal out of it compared to if she was on a non socially accepted drug. And if she actually does have bpd it also means she is very vulnerable to developing substance addictions compared to "normal" people. Very worrying situation. Manaki cant do much either. Lets just hope for the best. Wonder if she ever considered online therapy. In german that is. There just are things in your native language youll never be able to express with full emotions in your second languages imo. I can talk with a lot less stress/emotion about my issues in english/Japanese than I do compared to my native dutch.
That depends on how much you weigh. if you are extremely morbidly obese it should be easy and you could still eat quite a lot while losing weight. If you are obese or at the higher end of overweight you could be limiting your calories or exercising, or both. and it could be possible but you´d have to crash diet. if you are at a normal bmi. you do not need to lose that huge amount of weight cause you will be underweight if you do. I´ve lost 10 kg once in a month at a bmi of 29 over 10 years ago as a kid. with a 1200 calorie diet called ´´ziekenhuis dieet´´. its supposedly a Diet in my country the Netherlands that doctors will give you to eat in the hospitals if you are Having a major surgery in the near future, and they want you to shed some pounds before the surgery takes place. and if you just feel ´´flabby´´ and you are not actually fat, do not turn to calorie restricting but to working out. in that case you will want to tone up instead of dropping numbers on the scale