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Fujoshis, yaoi and fetishization

91 posts in this topic

Posted

not sure if anyone has mentioned this

but how come nobody mentions fundanshi's (male yaoi fans)?

when talking about Yaoi and how yaoi fans just fetishize and act gross and cringy

 

I mostly forget about them tbh I'm in a yaoi group on fb and there's some there and when I saw a post I was legit like "OH YEAH YOU GUYS EXIST". Eh you see more girls I guess. It's like for every 2 girls there's a boy. Idk.

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Posted

understandable 

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Posted

Yaoi and Yuri I don't mind especially yuri because I really like girls and boobs are great

Now fujoshis be taking stuff way too far and just down right fetishize people, and I keep hearing stories from people about how they be on the bus with their significant other and some fujo be like "omg its sin irl!!!!!111!!!" and making them umcomfortable af, and sadly I knew people like that (ironically they weren't straight but they weren't gay either) and jfc sometimes I couldn't talk to them and just start to blink out when they start their bullshit. And some of the stuff they say be making me umcomfortable too. 

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Posted

Thoughts on yaoi and fujos? Are they as bad as those guys who fetishize lesbians?
The fact that yaoi is made for a straight (girl) audience is ugly itself and I believe fujos fetishize gay men.
From what I've seen a lot...
What's with all those fujoshis calling themselves ''closeted fujoshi'' or a ''fujoshi in the closet''? 
What's with all those fujos asking for help on how to tell their family that they like yaoi and are a fujoshi? (Seriously wtf?)
What's with all those fujoshis calling their ships ''sinners''?
Whats with all those fujos watching gay movies meant for gay men?
Watching tv shows just because there are gay characters?
Calling gay movies or tv shows ''yaoi movies&shows'' ???
Shipping guys in real life and creeping on gay guys?
Wishing they were boys so they could be a gay guy(or more like a cute uke uwu), have sex with a man and live like they were in a yaoi??
(To the point that some started believing they are trans when they arent and just want to live like in a yaoi and (straight girls) pretending to be gay guys?).
I'm so done 

 

legit i used to be a fujo but i got tired of it cuz lots of fujos act like its a k**** and its annoying honestly

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Posted

I like yaoi but I am private with it. I don't push what I like to people and instead join groups that also do not do the same. We talk about it on our own time and we don't usually force it down others throats unless we post to our Tumblr blog but people can block those posts bu blacklisting or downloading that one Tumblr add on on Chrome. 

I think yaoi and being a fujoshi si fine as long as you draw a line. Not everyone likes yaoi and I understand that. Therefore I keep it to myself unless I find out they like it and even then I tread carefully because you never know how deep it goes for some people. I ship and read raunchy mangas, and such but like said I don't shove it down people's throats. 

I draw a line for myself because I don't want to make others uncomfortable just because I am a fan of something they might not be. It's just considerate to me and well *shrugs* I wish more fujoshis thought like this. 

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Posted

I uhh, tried to like yaoi because my friends were into it at the time... but it's really not my thing. Now 10 years later some of them still act like cringy weebs glued to yaoi on their phones and sqealing over their "gay boys"

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Posted (edited)

I went shopping with my problematic fujoshi ''friend'' (we're not rlly friends but whatever). So in the mall she saw two of her male classmates and took a picture of them in front of me. Of course I asked her why she did that because i hate when people take pictures of others without their permission. 

She then said ,,It's because my friend and I ship them xDDD haha. They share clothes, hug each other. But theyre lying to us and telling us that they're straight >.>''

That's what annoys me the most about irl shipping. Now the boys wont feel comfortable around each other and this results to guys not talking about their feelings, hugging and having a friend who shows them affection. 

Edited by Krystal
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Posted

No one cares about how much lesbians are fetishized and this is even more wide spread. I personally don't get the appeal of two dudes ass bumping and I wouldn't even date someone bisexual but I have no issue with other women into it.

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Posted

I am kind of into BL and stuff, but I wouldn’t call myself a fujoshi. But honestly, I think they’re fine, well as long as they know what theyre doing. There are the ones that can be weird, creepy ,gross, not know when to set a limit and be like “heyyy thats fucking weird, I should stop” and dont know what is ok and what’s not. And thats what I hate about the fandom. But personally, I set myself a strict rule that I can’t mix between what I like on the internet vs real life. Yaoi characters are like big tiddy goth gf, they are NOT real. Nobody acts or reacts like that in real life. The order of events are ridiculous. Even the faces and bodies are weird. I like the fluffy and cute — although not realistic — BL’s. They’re just something that makes me feel good and relieve my stress. And hey, I don’t care if you are watching 2 fictional guys fuck, thats your thing. But if you are reading yaoi most of your time, to the point it’s a “personality trait”, and fetishizing actual breathing gay (or straight in some cases) people, then get a life. It is literally being like a neckbeard with a waifu. But with guys, which is no better.

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Posted

i don't know if this thread is dead or not but on the chance it isn't i'll just tell y'all what i think

so the thing is, being or calling yourself a fujoshi is inherently homophobic. the word fujoshi means "rotten girl". so if you're a fujoshi you're calling yourself rotten for liking gay fiction/relationships/sex. now why would you call yourself rotten for liking gay porn when no one calls themselves rotten for liking straight porn? saying you're rotten or "sinning" for liking gay porn insists that homosexuality and/or gay porn is wrong and you're rotten for liking it despite it being sinful or wrong.

i'm pretty sure the term fujoshi was originally for women who thought homosexuality was wrong but still liked gay porn and thought they were sinful because of it. though i can't remember where i read it so i can't claim it to be completely true.

also in general it's just not a very good thing to be a fujo and not something you should be proud of. even if you're not into the problematic shit it's still bad. gay men don't exist for the pleasure of others, they're not fap material, something to fawn over and call cute or "your gay friend". they are human beings. fetishization is not activism. if you claim to support lgbt just be sure that you support them because you think they actually deserve rights and not just because you think they're cute.

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Posted

i think most people began to ship m/m couples becuase in animes the females charatcers wasnt well done made and just come of for fan service or as someone annoying. I think this is canon in naruto becuase the author said that he didnt do much with sakura becuase he didnt know how to write female characters, all female chars in most anmes are written in the male gaze and not many females can relate to this, and that why they like the male leads more, becuase their chars are "deeper" or whatever. Honeslty reading yaoi is just like reading ecchi or hentai, and honestly seeing two of the sex youre attracted to fuck is pretty much a turn on for most people.

But most "fujoshis" dont fetishes real people, and know that a fantasy is just that, a fantasy. Its mostly the younger fans that are into "shipping" real life people. I come from a christian household and because of that i also saw yaoi as "sinful" or "wrong" the first year or something when i got into it and i felt pretty horrible reading it and thought i was doing something wrong. but it helped me see the world in a different persons perspetive. iI remember reading some yaois about real life issues, where characters where bullied just becuase they just liked someone of the same gender, or abused by their parents or kicked out just becuase they liked someone of the same sex. This hoenstly made me hella angry becuase im a pretty empatic person and can sad for days after reading someting sad. (i get really invested in stories and i love to feel that angst) Im sure that many have had similiar experience as me, i know people love to shit on fujoshis but most of these girls calling it sinful or whatever are just young and trying to make sense of their feelings and belief and there is a high chance many of these girls comes from religlous households. If youre told something is wrong your entire life youre gonna believe it is. And these are prob just young girls or boys in their puberty going through some cringe face, that we all have. And i can tell ya growning up in a christian household sex still feels sinful and wrong to me even thought im an atheist, its like its so inbeeded in me that i cant help but feel wrong reading watching it or doing it. Kinda sucks how much of your early life still affect you. i can surely tell that telling kids about hell isnt that good for their mental state. Sorry i went a bit of topic but really, Its a fantasy, its a fantasy written by women for women, most of the time. its just like how hentai is written by guys for guys. That just the market, and i dont think its so different from hetro porn either. 

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Posted (edited)

I used to call myself a fujoshi because i didn't really know that it had a negative implication even on the Internet. Someone called me out because i said that i identified myself as a fujoshi and asked if i fetishize men, and i said no because i just like the BL genre itself and the characters i ship are majority man/man. I personally think that liking "yaoi" or Boy's love (BL) isn't bad. I guess if you're young and easily impressionable yaoi, as a term that connotes BL manga containing sexual acts, can definetely distort a young person's view on what gay relationships should be like. Reading fanfictions, doujins, manga and / or watching anime containing yaoi/bl isn't bad. Shipping real life people isn't bad (yes i said it.) What's bad is hypersexualizing gay relationships to the point that can distort your own view, shoving your own "gay ships" down people's throat thinking they're superior over hetero ships or they're actually dating in real life. 

In conclusion i think liking the BL / Yaoi genre is not bad, and being a fujoshi is definetely not bad unless you're fucking toxic as hell with other people about it, are immature towards the topic of ships and actually fetishize gay people. The original meaning of fujoshi has lost it's meaning so it is merely a distinction for someone liking yaoi. The fujoshi label on the internet is not a good implication though so if you want to avoid drama with over sensitive and sjw-ey people dont put that on your description. 

Edited by Gallicanae
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Posted (edited)

Tldr: in this day and age people can be better and they should stop clinging to outdated things like trashy fujo identities or bad tropes. stuff has generally improved thnx to increased awareness. If you like trashy sex romps its fine but it doesnt change that means that basically the only gay manga available is all trashy sex romps or so thats a problem

 

Fujoshi started as a term used by Japanese men to make fun of women who like That Gay Shit, but the girls ended up reclaiming the term. Since its a reclaimed "slur" people try real hard to defend using the term "fujoshi". Obviously fujo is still used by guys to discredit series aimed at women or have fanservice for women (ie Free!!).

 Its still bad to use though for the reasons ppl have talked about.This is not like reclaiming being called "bitch" or "slut". I dont understand people saying that invalidating fujoshi is trying to trample on females enjoying sexual things even if japanese girls are sexually oppressed. The rotten part of fujoshi references gay being rotten, not being horny. I get thats a real issue that should absolutely be addressed, but with so many improvements lgbt-wise in society do you really still want to raise females up by exploiting gays?

There are a lot more decent people now and the quality/diversity of both yaoi/yuri has improved but people forget how the genre and fanbase was built over many years. For every Antique Bakery there was an Okane ga Nai, plus an Enzai, plus another CJ Michalski. Its like how weaboo ceased being meaningful when generally normal people started calling themselves weebs making everyone forget that actually weaboos are disgusting. 

I dont mind hets/opposite genders writing or enjoying yaoi/yuri but obviously there are a lot of unhealthy depictions being made out to be healthy romance, which is the main issue nowadays. If you truly want something kinky and trashy own up to it like Harada. I like trashy het smut too but the biggest difference is that smut is just a sub-genre of available titles for het romance and much good het content exists. When someone has to say yaoi/yuri is basically ecchi/smut its just sad bc that means majority of lgbt titles are just badly written sexy times.

Yuri that's not lezu hentai has the opposite problem with things like the innocent Class S oneesama shit...Thats another rabbit-hole and its also problematic in a different way. Admittedly I have been less critical of yuri since yuri in English is much less available and its like okay ill take what i can get. I have less to say about fans of yuri because they have been less vocal in my experience.

But things are getting better in general bc awareness of real irl lgbt is going up. So yay. Im just wary of people who claim to be fujos, especially ones who also still go down defending certain things using psuedo-wokeness

Edited by pomelo
This got longer than i intended but yeah
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Posted (edited)

I'll admit to being a yaoi/slash fan in good standing but I make it a point to not make any sort of big deal out of it. I read the yaoi/lemon fanfiction of interest, I move onto whatever, mostly watching normal anime. I also read yuri. Being a pansexual bigender person, I often prefer bara anyway as it's largely written by and for gay men and is way less icky in ways.

But yeah some fujos are just embarrassing and annoying as hell. I hate that the fujoshi manga is gonna get the anime treatment. (Kiss Him Not Me!)

Edit: I'm trashing the fujoshi label, I'm not a woman anyway.

Edited by Locash Gamer
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Posted

I've got mostly negative feelings abt yaoi tbh. I tried to get into it in middle school since one of my online pals was into Junjou Romantica but eventually forgot it/grew out of uber weeby shit. I'm bi myself and I feel like yaoi portrays homosexuality in a negative light. The semes are always more dominant, masculine and strong while the ukes seem so effeminate it's almost like you can replace him with any female character, it forces the standards/mold of a straight relationship onto a gay one. Most relationships portrayed in yaoi are negative or predatory (from what I remember from middle school, there were often themes of sexual assault, rape or unwanted romantic advances). Yaoi's also usually made by women for women, it's not really for LGBT+ people or gay men to consume, which isn't accurate representation (though that's arguably not what most yaoi fans are coming for). The yaoi fanbase as a whole (from what I remember) isn't all that good either, they treat male characters (and sometimes actual men) like sexual objects or say stuff like "I'm such a sinner" for shipping two guys together, which kind of implies that they're into yaoi "just because it's taboo and not normal." A lot of them are fine with yaoi and think it's hot but think yuri is weird or gross, which I don't really get since it's still a same-sex relationship kinda genre.

In high school, I did know one girl who was a major yaoi fan though. She was a fujoshi (though she didn't use that exact term) and would sometimes gush about various MLM pairings. We had a guy friend in common and the guy was friends with two dudes named Adam, he constantly referred to one as "my Adam" to distinguish between them and the girl was all over it, going "omg you two would be such a cute couple" and all that. Whenever two guys brushed hands during lunch, she'd be like "that's so cute haha, you're so gay." Our school was also near the gay street of my city and she was so excited when she learned about it (since she was from another country), she was like "there's gonna be so many guys outside being gay, that's so cuteeee." When I confronted her about it, I told her it made me uncomfortable since I was bi and it felt like she was using sexuality as entertainment in a way, she told me it was just a joke and that I shouldn't take her seriously. The girl also said she was bi, but the guy friend I mentioned earlier told another one of my friends that the girl had never actually talked about having a crush or being attracted to another girl in any way so there's that.

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