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      Hi all, I paid the server bill for the month so the site can be archived, sorry for the mess, didn't realize there'd be such an uproar. The site's in read-only mode. Happy archiving. Here's a link to a user-made PULL discord server: https://discord.gg/vZFEm75

bestdressed/ ashley

5154 posts in this topic

Posted

I liked the video more than a lot of her recent stuff, but unfortunately I think for me I've just hit a point where I can't unsee the warts so to speak. My thoughts:

1. I'm glad she's taking time to learn to be by herself and be happy by herself--I know serial monogamist people who just went from relationship to relationship (despite many of them being unhealthy) just to never be alone, so I'm glad Ashley is trying her best to avoid turning out like that. THAT BEING SAID, I really, really, really want her to find some damn friends. Because it must be hard going through a break up alone, and also because the options shouldn't be reduced solely to "alone" and "with my SO". I just think her life would be so positively impacted by having even just one real, good friend who she could rely on. It was also pretty alarming to hear that she wanted friends since she had none in college so she went on Tinder to meet guys--there are a lot of concerns I have with that, and I hope she recognizes that that's definitely NOT the best way to make friends. I hope she tries to go out to social events (like movie nights, with other film nerds!) and forces herself to meet people even if it's a bit uncomfortable at first. Again, I do think it's great that she's learning to be alone and having a good time, I just want her to make at least one friend in addition to that.

2. Oh the plant......how many flies does she have in her apartment from not washing the dishes for two weeks? And if they're fruit flies, there are many, many ways to get rid of them (god knows I mistakenly forgot to take out the trash before I left one weekend in a hot NYC summer so I've been there) but carnivorous plants are pretty low on the list, if they're on there at all. I have a feeling she just thought it would be cool, because practically speaking I'm pretty sure carnivorous plants eat like one fly and then digest it very, very slowly. So, not the best solution. I wondered if that was why the cashier didn't respond when she shared why she was getting them--not because she was oversharing, but because it was kind of like buying a cup when there's water pouring in from your roof but the cup guy still wants to make a sale. 

3. When I first started watching her, I thought she seemed relatively mature and funny for her age, but now I really see her youth, especially when she was talking about certain things like love/relationships. I felt really anxious when I was 21 to be in a relationship...but that was only because I had never really dated before and was worried I would be alone forever. She's 21 and has had three relationships, at least one of which was almost a year? Idk I'm not sure why she's so pressed to be in a relationship, or why she felt even at 18 that her clock was already running down......but then again, I think many anxieties don't make sense from the outside. I just hope she really does learn to love herself rather than seeking external validation, but I do wonder if that will be possible since as another person mentioned her comment section is just full of overwhelming gushing support, and she seemed to not handle criticism well what with the deletion of comments on David's room makeover video. Time will tell, but she definitely has a lot of work to do on herself and I hope she makes progress on it. (Also, I think she would greatly benefit from seeing a therapist, as I feel most people would. Not meant to be a dig, but seriously I think a therapist would do wonders for her mental health.)

4. Why does she continuously make MD sound like bumfuck? I honestly don't get it. If she didn't specify she was from Maryland I would think she was from a rural countryside (which btw Ellicott City is not). Maybe this is a silly thing to be kind of annoyed about, but it's just frustrating because she makes it sound like her upbringing was kind of poor girl growing up in the countryside when the reality is that LA Nordstroms having Gucci etc is an anomaly, not that MD Nordstroms are so cheap and odd, and according to GG her father makes $300k+ annually (and her mother works as well), meaning they live and have always lived VERY comfortably. I know MD well and her area is a very, very nice one compared to some other counties and cities in MD that are much poorer (even the clip she showed shows houses that are VERY large and that city in MD is not cheap real estate). Had she said she was from another area in MD like Wheaton or something, I would cut her some slack. But her hometown is known to be affluent, so it just gives her words a disingenuous tinge to me now that I am more aware of her actual financial background versus how she likes to portray herself. 

5. Saying Mumford & Sons is great is not a "hot take", they are pretty well-known, well-liked, and have been mainstream for a while. More "I'm so different from others while actually still being pretty basic" imho.

I still like Ashley well enough, but I definitely see her imperfections a lot more clearly now and one of the main things that bothers me (now that David seems to be gone--good riddance) is how she tries to downplay and hide her privilege, especially growing up (well that and her "I'm so different from other girls" thing she does every now and then). I just think it's pretty crappy to be like ughhhh I'm so poor/I was so poor/I only know this cheapskate life when in reality it's a choice you're able to make since you have the money to live luxuriously if you wanted, and are kind of using that angle as a relatable shtick. Just be like "Listen, I buy the cheap stuff because it's great, I love it, and I love the money to stay in my damn bank account." It's a personal pet peeve of mine when Youtubers/anyone doesn't admit that they had privileges/are lucky to have lived a certain way and I wish more people would just call a spade a spade and admit they had a lot of good fortune in life due to their circumstances. 

Also this video seemed very average to me, not especially interesting to watch or listen to--I'm not sure if I've just lost interest or if the quality was less than some of her better videos. But her comment section was eating it up, so perhaps she'll move more into vlogging as it seems to be what her audience wants from her. (I just hope if she does that, she'll push herself to be more creative in her filmmaking technique.)

Sorry it's so long (and most likely no one cares what I think lol), but this video kind of summed up for me a lot of stuff about Ashley I've been feeling recently. All in all, I'm glad she seems not terribly distraught over the break up, I hope it's over for good and they don't get back together, I hope she continues with better content, I hope she values herself as a person more, and I hope she finds a good friend who will have her back and also begins to see a therapist. 

(But still, MAJOR improvement from all recent videos she had made featuring David)

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zapato.thumb.JPG.e833f5a088fd0250b45f7fb

comment.thumb.JPG.4c76fa8a59d0d04576ec0e

y'all notice this male-sized shoe? I noticed it because of this comment. In a way I wonder if she meant something by not choosing to pick it up and move it away from the camera

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tinfoil hat theory but what if she and david just agreed to keep their relationship private and make it seem like they broke up so ashley can pretend to be more relatable

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tinfoil hat theory but what if she and david just agreed to keep their relationship private and make it seem like they broke up so ashley can pretend to be more relatable

 

doubt because 

1) ALOT of sex jokes

2) she never had a relationship before so she was veeeery excited to show him off

3) she already admitted she was desperate for any affection/love so she doesnt look like the person to hide it

also the type of girls who even watch her content seemed to love bf/gf videos. 

some people actually look up to couples, if not, nobody would watch family channels

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zapato.thumb.JPG.e833f5a088fd0250b45f7fb

comment.thumb.JPG.4c76fa8a59d0d04576ec0e

y'all notice this male-sized shoe? I noticed it because of this comment. In a way I wonder if she meant something by not choosing to pick it up and move it away from the camera

 

are those her filas?

6a8df7db1d98ba956f9dc17cf70a5ff2.jpg

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are those her filas?

 

i don't think so, her filas have a taller heel + sole and the lining (around the toecap + collar) looks different.

i'm glad she's not with crusty david anymore, but i'm worried she won't get the support she needs to persevere through the breakup, especially since she's terribly insecure and has no close friends.

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omg yes finaLLY THEY BROKE UP I'm so proud of you Ashley!!

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I feel bad for Ashley too but I know this will be good for her in the long term :alpacacrush:

Breakups almost always hurt, whether they were good or bad to you. Many people still feel heartbroken even after leaving toxic relationships (NOT saying they had a toxic relationship, just that breakups almost always hurt.)

Eventually she will look back and realize he was just a mediocre frat boy, but for now, she has to mourn the loss of all their memories together, the future together she envisioned, etc. She might even be heartbroken for months but she'll heal and become stronger. 

I just hope this is a wake up call for her rather than propelling her into more negative behavior, like constant tinder hookups. (Not shaming anyone who likes to hook up, I just don't think it can be used as a replacement for all other human interaction.) Personally I find her pretty likeable when she is being more laid back and less in your face with the sex jokes. I'm sure she will make friends if she tries. 

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I'll be honest, i feel for Ashley right now. I saw a comment on there (I tired finding it but i guess it's been drowned out.) but i think she's really hurting. I could hear it in her voice and if you watch her other videos her voice sounds more cheerful, has a bit more life in it. She must've really liked this David dude. And when she was talking over dinner you could see the pain in her, she even started crying. I don't know maybe i'm thinking too deep into this but she deserves better. I hope she feels better soon.

 

I know how you feel. I may not agree with some of the things she says, but I remember being in that place, especially when I was her age wondering wth I was going to do with my life. There was part of me that felt like big sistering, but I know she'll get through it.

Edited by andherflowers
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I think it is her shoe but it's weird cause she always says how perfectionist she is... maybe she was lazy cause she is sad rn

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i don't think so, her filas have a taller heel + sole and the lining (around the toecap + collar) looks different.

i'm glad she's not with crusty david anymore, but i'm worried she won't get the support she needs to persevere through the breakup, especially since she's terribly insecure and has no close friends.

 

I think they are because the tread is exactly the same (round bottom heel area and then jagged edges along the front), and because they honestly do not seem that big to me....not sure what shoe size you guys are but it seems like a normal girl size to me. And the lines around the collar especially looks identical to me, and the toecap area just looks different cuz of lighting. Also, the lenses are totally different, which is why everything in that shot in her recent vid looks kind of stretched, more than it normally would (wide angle lens) versus the other one which she likely shot with a standard lens. There's a video on Youtube that shows what different lens sizes do to your face so you can get a good sense of that. So yeah, it seems pretty obvious imo that they're just her shoes, carelessly tossed aside (no judgment about that).

I also think Ashley is EXTREMELY focused and hard working when it comes to career/academics but still has a long way to go with classic "adulting" hence the leaving dirty dishes in the sink for two weeks leaving to a fly infestation, and leaving some shoes around the apartment. Nothing wrong with that, but I hope filming her life will encourage her to keep her space at home clean because I find whenever I'm depressed my space gets dirty, which just exacerbates my negative feelings and it all spirals. I hope Ashley mourns but I also hope she goes at this break up with the focused/hard working/determined part of her so she's able to really be mentally healthy and come out of it better than ever before and kind of make the effort not to let the sadness of a break up overwhelm her. Definitely interested to see what she comes out with next (I hope she tries to make more creative stuff using interesting film-techniques or even showing off her script writing abilities).

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wVbZag85Cc

Ashley posted this on her side channel today. For those who don't feel like watching, she just talks about the pressure most young people feel to Instagram everything, take photos in aesthetic locations, show off online, make videos of food you're eating, and all that stuff. She decided to not film anything in her New York Trip so she could enjoy the moment with her friends. I think she is quite well-spoken and intelligent when she's not trying too hard, she just graduated from a great school after all. 

Honestly I agree with her video. As a college student, whenever I'm doing something fun or unique, in my head I think "I need to take a photo of this so I can post it on my instagram." But I think I have learned to limit it. I feel like apps like Snapchat or Instagram Stories make me feel pressured to post something cool EVERY DAY which is just too much for me. Instead I like posting something cool on my instagram 1-2 times per month just so I have a little digital scrapbook but it's not at the front of my head.

Side note, she included a little bit of David in the video (she filmed it in New York in July.) I felt kind of sad for her having to upload that after they've split up. She probably didn't feel like going back to edit him out. It must be very bittersweet for her to upload it now. I hope she is doing well post-breakup. :alpacacrush:

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 a part of me needs someone to make a compilation video of all the times david was shitty to ashley in her videos. i haven't watched her that much so i never really saw it but so many people were saying he was a dick to her all the time in the comments of her last vid

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