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I think tattoos have gotten overrated. When I was younger I used to think they were cool and unique. Now that I've gotten older, I see them as unnecessary on most people. Or I don't see the point of them I guess. Also a lot designs seem unflattering on people(esp facial tattoos) and the people in question looked better without any. People seem to stand out more without any tattoos to me now. I'm glad I never rushed out to get any. I see now why older people I knew warned my age group at the time because they either regretted getting any, or went overboard with them before seeing them as an addiction after a certain point. Then in the end difficult to get removed, if that was even possible for them. Or they thought they needed to get them because their friends got them(or told them they 'needed' to in order to make their life 'exciting'), so technically they weren't even thinking for themselves about it. Now I think later there will just be yet another generation of people warning others against getting any, then that group rebelling getting them and the cycle continuing.
Mine was about 9 years ago. I almost didn't go because I thought I couldn't afford the ticket or dress. However, a friend of mine had an extra ticket, so I went. For my dress, my mom and I found this organization at the time that gave prom dresses to girls who couldn't afford one, and I found a really beautiful purple one (which I still have). I matched them with silver shoes a family friend lent me. My mom did my hair, and my older sister lent me her camera to use for the night. While at the prom I didn't dance, but spent the time talking to friends, eating and taking photos with people or the decorations. The theme was like a winter wonderland, which I thought came out really pretty. I did get a little annoyed with a few people wondering why I didn't dance, but I ignored them. They seemed surprised I was there in the first place though lol which was funny to me. I stayed until the end, so I didn't regret going. I went home afterwards and just talked with my family about everything.
I think that many people who speak out against toxic masculinity actually have the wrong idea of what toxic masculinity actually is. I don't think its when many guys have a preference of not wearing makeup, having their own products(even though we/women have this all the time? anyways...) having a certain fashion style ect, basically superficial things. I see toxic masculinity as guys who base their manhood solely on being aggressive all the time, what's essentially just alcoholism or being womanizers/or cheating on their partner with as many people as possible. Depending on the culture, one of those three is shown to be even worse than the other over time, however it seems to mainly boil down to those things. I've seen over the years, even in my own culture, men who justifiably aren't interested in those things being told they aren't 'man enough' by both sexes, shamed and thus needing to 'prove' themselves (just to keep certain "friends") as men by going on binges of one the three or all three at the same time. We're conditioned at an early age to find this behavior acceptable, when it just ruins someone's life and their loved ones dealing with the aftermath. When people rightfully address it as a problem, essentially the lame excuses made are, "that's just what men do\that's how men are\its in their dna there's nothing wrong with it". I also noticed its done because those attributes all fall into the 'bad boy rebellion' trope too. I know not all men are like this, thankfully. I'm also glad see more men call out guys like this.
Long post srry It seems more evident than ever that many fans see their biases/bias groups as just characters or clowns on the internet, and not actual people even if they've seen them in person multiple times. I can't look at many of my faves the same way when/if they've revealed something disturbing, heartbreaking or self-destructive about themselves(which is done mostly to vent as therapy not to glorify). Yet to a large subsection of fans, everything that was said is funny, downplayed and has to be made a running joke out of. Sometimes egged on as if they're watching a reality show, to able to keep a weird narrative going because they want to live vicariously through them(due to their age they can't do certain things) or think its some form of cool, relatable rebellion? Then like clockwork when actual concerned fans speak out, they keep getting shut down with immature things like, 'you're not their mom/you're jobless/they're grown women/men ect" deflection. Also acting as if parents are the only people in world who are supposed to care about another person, which is such a strange train of thought to have. Fans who have an issue with concerned fans are also constantly babying their biases so, it's like, which is it? They want them to be role models or pillars of society, but that's not possible for many of them unfortunately and its okay to admit that. It's definitely disappointing, I've been there believe me, but there are people who are worth that title somewhere. Even though its hard to find these days. I guess it's easy to blame mostly younger fans of this stuff, but I've seen many fans my age(26 and up) doing it too. Either way, as someone who's been into kpop for over a decade, seeing the lack of basic humanity or accountability has really gotten so disturbing. I see why so many 'locals' get turned off from interacting with any of it nowadays. I don't blame them either tbh. The majority of the time now I keep a distance from a lot of fandom activities or the groups themselves depending on what they've done.
I usually stop what I'm doing and find somewhere to sit by myself for awhile. There are also times I try to distract myself by walking, listening to music, cooking, playing a mindless or requiring not much critical thinking skills video game on my phone, computer, or ps4. If I can't do those things, I'll read a book, watch a favorite childhood show and movie. Doing one of those things usually help me a lot. It helps to have a lot of hobbies when something like this happens.
-I thought I'd like Z-girls more, but something seems missing from their overall sound to make them stand out a bit more. Although their concept is interesting at first. I plan to casually follow I guess to see where I go. -I really want to hear more vocal coaches with unbiased opinions on kpop singers' song on youtube, but I know that's not quite possible in the current climate. Even the very few who are somewhat critical have a petty habit of exaggerating just for the sake of getting certain fans upset so idk anymore. Although I'm not an expert myself, I have been involved with different chorus' growing up. Which means I can tell when a vocal coach is actually being helpful when complimenting or giving advice on certain singing techniques. Or proper advice when its obvious someone's life choices are affecting their singing in a bad way that can cause permanent damage if not remedied asap. Like I said though, it seems many now are afraid to upset fans even if what they are saying is correct. -I'm pretty much so over people constantly covering for a company's obviously questionable, fake or inhumane decisions over time. Sure, a company is a company that does things to make money. However, that doesn't excuse a lot of things. It's understandable people don't want to upset the group they like when they see fans complain. Some things should be said and seen unfortunately for things to get better. Even the old excuse, "well why would they sign with that company again if they don't like how they're being treated?", doesn't make sense to say. Especially when so many groups in kpop have resigned with a company that treated them badly all the time behind the scenes or out in the open, only for things to get worse for them the longer they've stayed. Fans and the company hiding it doesn't help anyone involved. The more that's covered up the worse it looks, so there's no point in doing that.
Although I don't personally cosplay, from what I've seen most people seem to have fun most of the time. Everytime there's a convention the local news reports on it and celebrate the best ones. Often asking people where they got them from, or how it was made. There are some people that think its annoying though during the times when people's costume's overcrowd the trains/buses. Or may think its weird from afar but that's about it usually.
1.I'm really disgusted by so many fans defending Seungri. Glad to see Korean fans not falling for it, but to to other internationals fans do so is embarassing. I say this as someone who actually thought he would be given the wrong end of the stick just becaus ehe was ounger. But after this ongoing issues with Burning Sun its pretty clear now that he, his mom and other staff members knew what was going on. There is no way he didn't. I'm sure YG did as well. 2.I really wished people didn't automatically make Jimin a victim during that incident months ago before Japanese news sites began reporting on what occurred. He wasn't a victim. It was wrong for him and any other person to wear that shirt multiple times with no regard towards the people affected. It's not difficult to put yourself in someone elses' shoes when seeing imagery like that. Everything doesn't have to be aesthetics. I kind of wish the Army fandom would start over sometimes. Although no fandom is perfect, I'm just tired of the increase of fans attacking other fans and anyone with legitimate critics for BTS. BTS also plays a hand in this by claiming they don't care about criticisms, then the next moment talking about it again in songs as if they're unbothered. Then that sets off fans to attack other people again. Rinse, repeat.
3. I thought it was in bad taste Got7 had a drinking episode in Hard carry s2 almost immediately after JB and Jinyoung were on Hello Counselor talking with an alcoholic/abusive parent months ago. Especially since JB shared the fact that his biological father was the exact same way and his parents divorced because of it. Korea has a hard enough time acknowledging alcoholism as a whole(other fans like forgetting this so they can laugh at their faves drinking for some reason), so I was really confused and disappointed in them for adding to it. It seemed out of character to me for them to even have something like that since they were always goofy and funny without the need for things like that. I know Hello Counselor doesn't take serious topics seriously, but I've side eyed Got7 again for this(although this isn't the first time). They had plenty of great shows without that type of stuff, and no one was asking for it either.
There's also the fact that maybe a year ago Jinyoung mentioned Got7 weren't interested in doing shows/or eps with alcohol because they wanted to set a better example for their fans. I have to applaud Stray Kids for actually taking the initiative to share with fans that they don't drink and won't do things just because everyone else is. I have much more respect for them as a casual fan in comparison to Got7 who is actually one of my bias groups. Similarly I'm tired of BTS doing drinking based shows and wish they took the route Stray Kids did. They would've had even more of an impact than they do now. I can't even watch most of their shows now. I've never found things like that entertaining, more sad and exploitative.